Naruto MixUp
by Temari 88
Summary: 50 sentences featuring different characters  and some pairings  of the anime/manga; large variety of genres and situations. Written to get out of writer's block and to experiment on characters I've never used before. *may contain minor spoilers*


_Hello everyone! :D_

_Alright, I was lacking inspiration this month (more like write's block struck) - which sucked because I have a couple of fics I need to update and I couldn't write a story to celebrate Gaara's birthday D: - so I used the 1 Sentence meme at LJ to__ at least __keep my mind active... so I have a bunch of drabbles/flashfics featuring a large variety of characters and pairings (some of which I've _never _written about) I wanted to share with the lot of you, now that the meme is mostly finished and I don't see any other interesting prompt._

_Disclaimer: I own nothing but what I wrote._

_Ja ne,  
Temari :)_

* * *

**Shino - Panties**

Shino opened his window at the sound of a paw scratching against the glass only to find Akamaru crunched there, a bundle of cloth in his mouth, so he reached out and found the dog had been holding a pair of panties-his mother walked in at that moment but couldn't muster the strength to ask anything, she just remained there as a blush formed on her son's face.

**Itachi - Agony**

Nothing was more agonizing for Itachi than to be resurrected by Kabuto and hear Madara tell him Sasuke had joined Akatsuki... it seemed his little brother didn't understand what he had tried to convey during their fight...

**Jiraiya, Tsunade - Interval**

Standing over Jiraya's prone and quivering body, scantly covered by her towel and wiping away a drop of sweat from her forehead, Tsunade thought that after twenty minutes straight of beating up the fool, she deserved a little interval before she finished him off to her heart's content - the onsen was meant to be relaxing after all.

**Gaara/Naruto - Speechless**

In most cases, it was Naruto who was rash and sometimes forgetful of his surroundings... but right now, as Gaara pinned him on the table of the meeting room - full of speechless council members of both countries - he thought maybe he had rubbed off on his boyfriend a little too much (not that he minded).

**Gaara/Naruto - Breath**

Naruto quickly looked up from the muddy ground, where he had been scuffling jovially with Konohamaru, at the sound of barely restrained chuckles and a ground out "Idiot." that quickly turned into breathless laughter as his dirt-caked face made contact with Gaara's green eyes.

**Minato/Kushina - Hesitation**

Minato had just reappeared into his home and for a split second, as he watched his wife hold their newborn son with one shaking arm, he was terribly tempted to quickly grab them and disappear as far away from Konoha (and the Kyuubi and Madara) as possible...

**Temari, Kankurou - Schadenfreude**

Temari has always disapproved Naruto's despicable habit of pranking people, but she can't help the rancorous laughter leaving her mouth as she sees Kankurou walk into the kitchen with red and orange face paint, a scowl twisting his mouth and openly cursing Leaf ninjas.

**Mei Terumi, Gaara - Young**

The Godaime Mizukage was not a kind-hearted woman, nor was she easily moved by anything - a kunoichi _must_ have a steel heart on the battlefield, even more than any shinobi - yet witnessing the Kazekage give his speech to the army, she couldn't help the slight knot at the base of her throat as she almost regretted placing such a heavy burden on such young a man - but a ninja was a ninja and age was to be forsaken in a war.

**Naruto - RAMEN!**

Have you ever wondered what the world of Naruto would be like, if the main character - Uzumaki Naruto himself - wasn't a ramen junkie? I bet you didn't, it's too scary a prospect to think about... but indulge me: if Naruto didn't live off ramen, Teuchi-san would have closed his shop long ago because the huge bills the blond shinobi paid made up half of his income; without that income, Teuchi-san wouldn't have the money to pay his own expenses and the monthly taxes; those taxes where vital to repair Naruto-related damages and those damages, if left for themselves, would lead to Konoha crumbling in a mountain of absurdly-painted ruins; with Konoha in ruins, the Fire Country was doomed...

"YAY! RAMEN, HERE I COME-TTEBAYO!" Thank God Naruto loved ramen...

**Konohamaru, Sasuke - Patience**

After having spent years in Team 7 with Naruto and then working under the blond when he was named Godaime Hokage, Sasuke had pretty much ran out of patience (which was never a lot to begin with) and now he was sure he would end up strangling his genin team, especially if Konohamaru tried to use Oiroke no Justu on him _again_ in the middle of a mission!

**Hinata - Warrior**

Hinata knows she's grown and matured a lot in the past years, she's become a deign heir of the Hyuuga clan... still, she doesn't know if she'll be strong enough to be a warrior in the upcoming war against Akatsuki...

**Danzo, Sai - Pet**

Danzo knows he's lost one of his most faithful pets as he stands stone still on top of the Hokage Tower, looking down at '_Sai_' as he walks side by side the Kyuubi brat.

**Kakashi - Forgive**

Kakashi was firmly convinced he had so many things he would like to be forgiven for, but knows also he would never be... his crimes were too big for forgiveness.  
What he doesn't realize is that everyone he feels he's let down, have never blamed him for anything.

**Shikamaru - Troublesome**

Nothing was able to archive such a complete, profound and shocking silence as Shikamaru not saying 'troublesome' at something for more than two hours...

**Kakashi, Hinata - Perfomance anxiety**

Walking among the ranks of shinobi ready to fight, Kakashi caught sight of a very nervous Hinata who was worriedly twirling her hands together, ready to faint at any given moment; the jounin approached her and placed a hand on her shoulder, smiling a little under the mask.

"Calm down, Hinata, I know you're anxious about this but you are more than capable enough." he said but the young woman didn't seem to believe him, "Listen, just do your best and remember _why_ we're doing this, all right?" he was pleased to see a look of determination replacing the anxiousness.

******Itachi, Sasuke - Hospital**

Itachi walked into the hospital room where his otouto was bed-ridden (he had tried to escape) and felt his lips tug to form a smile as he saw Sasuke waving a fist to the other occupant of the room.

"Sasuke, it's not Naruto-kun's fault that you jumped off the tree; he didn't force you to."

"Are you kidding, nii-san? The dobe _dared me_! Uchihas do _not_ back away from challenges!"

**Sai - Caffeine**

The situation, for Team Kakashi, could have been considered funny - hilarious even - if it weren't for the torture they were being subjected to... that night, Naruto, Sakura and Yamato learned to _never_, **_ever_ **let Sai drink too much caffeine, because seeing him hopping around singing was not worth the bother: Sai couldn't sing if it killed him.

**********Kiba/Sai - Scent**

Kiba wasn't exactly sure why Sai's sent, at that moment, was having such an strong effect on him... probably it was because smelling the sent of arousal on such an emotionless prick was simply too exciting to pass up the chance at a little fun.

**Kisame - The first time**

Finally his sensei thought him ready to try and use Samehada... Kisame had been waiting for this moment for years and the prospect of wielding the sword had pushed him to train hard.

"Here it is, Kisame, this is Samehada." said his sensei, unwrapping the shark-like sword for the young chunnin to see. The scales glinted eerily in the light, the hissing coming from its mouth giving anyone goose bumps...

"... Beautiful..." whispered Kisame, his hand reaching for the hilt even as the sharp teeth tried to chop off his fingers.

******Sakura/Sasuke - Asphyxiation**

It's the first time is a long while that Sakura has been this close to Sasuke... she can't even remember exactly when was the last time, she doesn't care to recall it, though, because she is here now... and it matters not if her one and only love - unrequited, _always _unrequited - is mercilessly crushing her throat staring at her-dying with his sent in her nose and his face so close is a comfort... the only comfort she can hope to get from Sasuke and right now, it's enough...

**Sakura, Kakashi - ANBU**

Sakura had known her sensei had been part of ANBU, but only when she sees the tattoo on his arm, does she realize how _heavy_ a burden it is, to devote one's life to the Black Ops... it was no wonder Kakashi kept so much to himself.

**Naruto/Gaara - Insomnia**

Naruto had been staring at Gaara for sometime, without speaking a word, and the red-haired was starting to get worried; he was about to ask what was the matter, when the blond finally pursued his lips in an attempt to refrain from laughing... when Gaara raised his eyebrow in question, his answer was: "I was trying to imagine you without those black circles..."

**Zabuza, Haku - Porcelain**

On a particularly lazy evening, letting his mind drift for a moment, Zabuza turns to take in Haku's features and he thinks the boy is like porcelain: pale, cold, elegant and... _fragile_... then he shakes his head to refocus on their surroundings and quickly dismisses the thought.

**Obito, Kakashi - Challenge**

Kakashi would have liked to punch Obito in the face, for the challenge he threw his way without even letting him a chance to protest-living would be the most difficult dare he could imagine right about now...

**Naruto, Kakashi - Secrets**

Naruto finally understood why, in his early days as a ninja, Kakashi had never paid him much attention - he looked too similar to his father and the man couldn't get rid of his guilt and anger. Kakashi knew Naruto knew but neither said anything: it was a secret between them.

**Team 7 - One Piece**

"I can understand why you chose that, Naruto..." said Sakura, turning to look at her team mate - dressed in a light blue vest, red knee-length jeans and a straw-hat - "and I also guess I get Sasuke-kun's choice..." she continued, now staring at her other team mate who had chosen a black dress shirt and pants, complete with a giant (fake) black sword and (weird) fake mustache, "**BUT WHY DID I HAVE TO COSPLAY SANJI**?"

"You don't have enough boobs _and_ you always go 'Sasuke-kun~~~'... I mean, you can just change that into 'Sasuke-chwaaaannnn~~~' and you'll be perfect!" answered Naruto, Sasuke nodding his assent next to him.

**Anko - Honey**

It's a rare sight to see Anko do any sort of shopping - she would usually (threaten) ask some newbie do to it for her - and is even less usual to see her linger in the sweets isle because everyone knows the only sweet thing she eats are dango. The woman stares at a row of assorted honey for sometime, then she scoffs and turns around-dangos and blood is all the sweet she needs in her diet.

**Shino - Onomatopoeia**

_Crunch_

Shino looks down, appalled, as he realizes he's stepped on a family of bugs.

**Kakuzu - Kitten**

He's always thought Deidara was annoying and LOUD but now Kakuzu was hitching to finally kill him-he hadn't said anything when that she-man had brought into their lair a freaking cat but now that _animal_ was playing with his balled up vines while he tried to straightened them out!

**Zabuza/Haku - Afterlife**

He had never expected them to end up in the same part of the afterlife - he was an assassin whose hands were soaked in the blood of thousands, while Haku was a sad angel who had suffered due to others ignorance - but floating in the sea of crimson, alone, felt strange and _empty_ nonetheless...

**Naruto, Team 7 - Candles **

In the past, when Hokage-jisan came to his apartment with a small cake and a candle, Naruto would always ask to one day celebrate his birthday with more than just jisan and - later on - Iruka-sensei... so now, as a cake adorned with thirteen candles waiting to be blown stood on his table and his team mates and jounin sensei there before him, he suddenly found he didn't know what else to ask for.

**Neji, Kakashi - Pretty-boy**

He knew who was walking in front of him even before setting his eye on that back, but he decided to mess with Neji anyway, he was way too pretty for a boy his age (much less for a _shinobi _his age) and that's why he openly shouted "Yo! Hinata-chan how are you doing?" before correcting himself in the most fake show of sorriness ever seen in Konoha, "OOH! It's you Neji... sorry! With that hair it's easy to mistake the two of you!"

**Fugaku Uchiha - Fugu **

"Oh... I might have done a mistake while cleaning the ball-fish..." comes Mikoto's quiet voice, way too calm considering the words that have just left her mouth. Fugaku stares at her with wide and shocked eyes, aware of the piece of fugu he's swallowed... he's already starting to feel nauseous, his breathing comes in quick and he's close to hyperventilating-

"... No, now that I remember, I did not touch the sack with the poison..." says Mikoto, a smile on her face, completely oblivious to her husband's near stroke.

**Shisui/Itachi - Forbidden**

As much as Itachi was a fervent believer in rules, right then, he didn't care that laying there in his bed with Shisui was forbidden or that if his father found out, it'd be the death of him... the only thing that mattered was the feeling of being one with the only person who really understood him.

**Kabuto - Sexy nurse dress**

He looked at the sexy nurse dress with a skeptical light in his eyes - he really didn't think Orochimaru-sama would actually find the outfit appealing, but it was worth a try.

**Gaara - Strike**

Thinking back on the days of bloodshed he indulged in when he was younger, Gaara can't help but be glad he found shinobi, in Konoha, who would stand up to him even after the first strike, when everybody else would have laid at his feet, dead.

**Sasuke/Sakura - Regret **

As Sasuke is forced into the alternate dimension inside Madara's mask, he sorely regrets one thing: he didn't dispose of Sakura once and for all.

**Team 7 - Fanfiction**

The first time they came across it, it was awful and shocking; they couldn't believe people would write about them, much less make them do _some _of the things they've read... then it became a sort of morbid fascination they couldn't get enough of, no matter the length some authors went to make them miserable... but when they found a particular section with hundreds of fanfictions under the names_ 'Orochimaru/Sasuke'_, Naruto and Sakura couldn't help but laugh long and loud at the fainted body of their team mate (especially at the foam at the corner of his mouth).

**Sasuke - Panties **

Sasuke could stop shaking in anger; this was the last straw... last year his team mates and given him a huge Itachi-shaped rubber doll and now they had the guts to gift him a pair of panties-a _frilly, pink-and-red, polka-dotted_ PAIR OF **PANTIES**!

**Gaara - Laughter **

It wasn't surprising that the first person to feel confident enough to jump on Gaara, sure that no harm would come his way, to assault him with tickling fingers was Naruto and the resulting chocked laughter was the best prize the blond could ask for.

**Sasuke - Crack **

"I want to participate to the drag queen contest in Otogakure. I'll definitely win even against Orochi-dono!" said Sasuke and an horrified yell rang throughout Konoha as all his fans fainted from shock.

**Sai - Sexy no jutsu**

Watching the kid with the scarf and his clone transform into himself and the Uchiha - naked and about to kiss - was making him unconsciously think he wouldn't mind such a scenario happening...

**Pein - Pain **

He had long since forsaken the name 'Nagato'; ever since Yahiko's death, he had taken up the name '_Pein_' and he had continued to live (though, could his really be called 'life' at all?), with only his will of purifying the world through suffering and pain to carry him forward and yet... now as he performed his last technique, he found all his pain was being lifted from his shoulders and heart, _at last_.

**Itachi - Crash**

The last thing he heard, as he crashed to the ground with his last breath escaping his lips, was the voice of his little brother calling his name in earnest-the echo of a long time past, making him smile even as his conscious faded forever.

**Gaara - Sensor sand **

From the moment he set up the trap, laying his sensor sand down in the canyon ahead of their position, he has turned his head only once to look at the hundreds of shinobi under his command and in that fleeting moment of respite, he has let his mind wander and think about those they were all trying to protect, but when his feels his sand activate, he turns to face ahead again and crosses his arms. "They're here." -There was **no way** they'd back down.

**Team 7 - Chibi **

The three of them couldn't have had a more different childhood-Sakura was born a single child in a civilian family and the way she spent her day as a little girl of four years was running around with her civilian friends and neighbors; Sasuke was a member of the prestigious Uchiha clan and since he started walking about, he spent his days running after his brother, trying to catch up to him; Naruto was born and had no family to be known of (not until _much _later) and spent almost all of his waking hours since learning to stand up, trying to run away from the mobs chasing him down around the village.

**Zetsu - Piranha Plant**

His eyes rested on the beautifully potted Piranha plant and finally Zetsu realized he had found the perfect match for him.

**Neji - Shampoo**

"You know, Neji, with that hair you could have been perfect for _Timotei_'s commercial instead of that chick...!" said Kiba with a serious face.

**Sasuke/Sakura - Last**

She blinked and opened her mouth to say something, but in the end she decided to keep quiet about what had just happened-Sasuke would kill her if she told him she thought he would've lasted longer than he had...

**Kakashi/Rin - Tender**

Kakashi knew she loved him - her crush had long since evolved into something deeper - and he was thankful for it even if he couldn't find it in him to return her feelings, because it meant that no matter how much he believed he had failed a lot of those he cared about, she would always be there, treating his wounds with tender gestures meant to heal not only physical injures but also those invisible to the eyes.


End file.
